Half Birthday

Happy (very belated) 6 months to my little loves. I am a naughty mommy for not getting this posted in a timely manner, but I think they are still young enough to forgive me.

I feel like there are little milestones every day and Anson & Ayla are becoming their own people more and more. Their personalities couldn't be more different, and that thrills me. Ayla is very outgoing and cheerful, but expects her wants, needs and desires to be met Right This Minute. She likes to be active and would rather roll and scoot all over the place as opposed to sit still to play with a toy. Anson is more laid back and enjoys figuring out how things work. He likes the toys on the bouncer more than bouncing and loves blocks and his xylophone.

This month Anson started the process of being fitted for a DOC Band. This is a medical device that looks like a helmet. It will help to reshape his head, which has some flattening from being cramped in the tummy with his sister and unable to move around the last few months of our pregnancy. In the next couple of weeks it will get a fun design courtesy of The Wrap Shoppe who designs them as a public service. Stay tuned for pictures when that arrives.

Although their spoken vocabularies are limited (Anson is the only one "talking" and his only word is "Mama" which he uses to beckon me.), they are recognizing certain words and commands:

Where's Kaiser? - Ayla especially will look around to find him when you mention his name. She acknowledges that she has a brother and that he is "okay", but she LOVES that dog. They are besties.

Two Hands - Both kids will hold their own bottles with 2 hands when you remind them. This is particularly helpful with Anson who likes to "wag" his bottle with his left hand only. (I think we have a little leftie on our hands!)

Up - Both kids will reach up to you to be picked up. If Ayla is in the bouncer, she will straighten her legs to "stand" for you to pick her up.

Can You Shake Hands? - Anson will reach out and flatten his right hand to shake hands. He prefers if he is told "it's very nice to meet you" in conjunction with this.

Where's Daddy? - Both kids will look at photos of Tim in the hallway if you pause and talk to them about him. This is both sweet and very sad to me, because I hate that they might think the pictures are called Daddy and not realize that he was a real man who loved them so much.

Bite - Ayla is loving trying all these new foods and will open for a bite. Anson, on the other hand, has not quite mastered the art of eating and really prefers not to have to eat real food. (I totally understood this when they were eating only cereal because that stuff is gross, but I have made them homemade foods of carrots, sweet potatoes, avocado and squash, all of which were pretty tasty!)

These kids are fortunate to have so many people in their lives who love them so much. I am fortunate to have people around me who realize that I need help sometimes. We are all making it through one day at a time.

Happy 4th

In Tempe, every cop works the 4th of July. That's just how it is. Nobody questions it, but many wish they didn't have to be there. For good reason, too. The rest of us are uncomfortable in the heat, but we aren't standing in direct sun for 10 hours wearing layers of dark clothing, a bullet proof vest and pounds upon pounds of equipment.

Last year, Tim didn't work the 4th. He wasn't feeling well, but we got to spend dinner with my family. We got to be home with Kai to make sure he was okay with the fireworks. One more "last" that we didn't know would be our last. Two years ago, I was able to be at Tempe Town Lake sitting right next to where Tim was posted, watching fireworks "together".

All day today, I thought about all Tim's friends working and how happy I was that it was beautiful and overcast for them. A little blessing on a day they would surely rather be at home with their own families than out there making sure the rest of us are safe.

I thought about how we looked forward to the kids getting bigger and me taking them to the Tempe fireworks in a wagon so we could sit near Tim and "ooh" and "aah" together. How we would have been able to talk about how pretty it was the next day over breakfast. How he would have talked to whomever he was working with that night about our family.

I never took Tim's goodness for granted, but I took life for granted. I assumed there would be another day, another year, another memory, another opportunity. Love your husband. Kiss your kids. Every day you are making memories and none of us know what the future holds. Make each day count. Don't complain.

Kaiser Turns 2!

On Saturday, Kaiser turned two marking a big milestone in his life and in our lives. We celebrated with a (lately infrequent) trip to the dog park and then to Petsmart for a new toy, some rawhide chews and the makings for a doggie birthday cupcake. 

Tim and I researched breeds, first dreaming of a chocolate lab before settling on the intelligence, protectiveness and appropriate energy of a German Shepherd. Kaiser was one of a little of 5 puppies born to a mother known only as Goldie - a blonde shepherd who was found wandering the desert of Southern Arizona while pregnant. A lady who raises Golden Retrievers took her in and cared for her and the pups until they could be placed for adoption through the Southern Arizona German Shepherd Rescue. 

Our interview process was intense. Phone interviews, aerial photos of our home and our neighborhood, discussions on training and discipline, lists of the closest dog amenities sent via email.... We adopted Kai 2 weeks before we moved into our new house. 

Kaiser is my first dog and little did we know at the time, the only shot Tim and I had at co-parenting. We took our responsibility very seriously and enrolled him in puppy classes and worked on manners, behavior and tricks with love and consistency. 

Over the last many months, Kai has become a big support for me and also my great protector. He is the perfect blend of protective and gentle, always knowing what is appropriate. He does not trust men that he doesn't know and is fiercely loyal to his family. He believes that A&A are "his" babies. 

We brought home blankets from the hospital to swaddle dolls so that he could learn their smells and begin to adjust before they came home. Kaiser was quick to fall in love when Ayla & Anson were born in January and now loves nothing more than having "tummy time" with them. He is a wonderful "fuzzy brother" and I am forever so proud of the dog he has become. 

Obsessing? Me?

Now that I have a firm date in my mind about when the babies will arrive, some things are happening.

I am assembling, organizing, cleaning and obsessing over things that don't need to be obsessed over. Like whether my camera is good enough to photograph them. If there is too much dust on the baseboards. Whether it is crazy to shave Kaiser so he doesn't shed near them. (Yea, he wasn't wild about that idea either....)

I am going over and over the mental list of the things to remember at the hospital. Take the baby CPR class they offer. Learn to swaddle because when I've tried, the doll I used looked like a baggy burrito. Make sure Mom gets photos of their first bath. Do you think I could teach her to run video on the camera? Probably not, she still stumbles through checking the voicemail on her blackberry. Pictures, lots of pictures. Don't forget all the tips and tricks I learned about breast feeding. Which lactation consultant was it I was supposed to avoid?

Months back, people started suggesting that I take a Lamaze class or some other kind of birth class. I couldn't. I just couldn't go there with all the other moms and dads and pretend everything was okay. I was told there are special classes for single moms and their coaches and I wanted to scream, "I'M NOT SINGLE!!!" So, here I am, 3 days from the Big Day and I have no idea how to have a baby other than what I have read in books and watched on cable. I keep assuring myself that I'll have Mom there and she knows things. And my wonderful friend Shannon will be there and she knows even more things. This should be a comfort to me, and in most moments it is.

In the other moments it isn't and I get frustrated and sad and I feel jipped because my best cheerleader and the one person who knows how to handle all of my million moods doesn't get to talk me through this. Instead, I have to do what I'm growing more accustomed to doing: I have to 'just know' what he would say and know that he is there watching and looking out for me, even if nobody can see him.

Every real-feeling contraction has me thinking this could be it and I'll be out of time to get done all the tings I need to get done. ("Need" is relative here.)

I should go clean the fridge because I don't want our kids coming into a house with old mustard in the fridge.....

Sweet Baby Dog

Saturday morning when I woke up, Kaiser was sleeping backward on his bed. It wasn't until he was up and moving that I realized he had vomited on his bed twice in the night. He has never had a weak stomach, so I was concerned. Throughout the day he was lethargic and refusing food and water. He was even refusing "cookies". 

My parents came over to help me with a few things in the late afternoon and I confessed that I was so terrified that something serious was wrong that I had been unable to have a nap or think of anything else. 

Normally I would probably go by Tim's logic on this which is that "sometimes dogs feel crappy just like people do" and "it will usually pass on it's own". But I just couldn't shake my fear. Kaiser has been my best buddy the last few months. It makes me feel like I am not a crazy woman talking to myself if I am talking to him. His big bark and protective nature make me feel safe. His tender side licks my tears away when I'm sad and missing Tim. I just couldn't let anything happen to him. 

I called a friend of Tim's whose wife is a great vet. Even though she was at a Christmas party, she talked me through things before sending us off the the ER. (Better safe than sorry.) 

My dad went with us and Kai was so sweet with all the staff. He just felt too crummy to make their night exciting. They ran a couple different blood tests and took a few x-rays to see if he had possibly swallowed something. The blood tests came back fairly normal. The x-rays showed nothing foreign in his tummy (thank goodness - apparently he is smart enough not to swallow rocks), but a lot of gas. 

He was sent home with a probable diagnosis of Gastritis and possible Pancreatitis. He is on a low-residue diet and Prilosec once a day. He seems to be making progress toward recovery and was even PLAYING last night - an enormous improvement. His new vet called to check on him this morning and is happy with the progress he is making thus far. 

Looks like I got my first taste of motherly worry.... lots more to come, I'm sure.  

Peace Out, Cowboy.

I've learned a whole lot from having Kaiser in the family. As my first dog, it has been his job to teach me about dog expressions, behavior and gestures. He's been a wonderful teacher.

Tim and I have made a very conscientious effort since he was a puppy to socialize him and let him know what we expect of him. This has included us working hard on being consistent, bringing him to public places so he learns proper etiquette and almost daily trips to the dog park.

Kai is pretty friendly - he will play with any dog. He knows no size, color or breed - everyone is a potential playmate. I generally find this quite endearing about him.

In the 6 months that we have been going to the park, there have been 2 dogs that have had a problem with Kai. Both dogs have a reputation at the park as being vicious and attacking other dogs. I have no idea why their owners take them there considering their anti-social behavior. In both instances, the dog parents do not stay close by their dogs, and generally do not watch them. In both cases, Kaiser has been attacked by each dog totally unprovoked - he wasn't even trying to play with them.

The first nasty dog is a wiener dog names Schnitzel. I know, you think a handsome German like Kai shouldn't have a care in the world for a wiener dog with an attitude problem, but I'm telling you, this guys is downright mean. Schnitzel will sink his teeth into my sweet baby and shake and his owner has offered me nothing but a "he's fine". (Hey, buddy, don't talk to me about how MY dog is. Kthxbye.)

The second bad dog is a sheep herding dog named Cowboy. His owner sits on a picnic table and allows his wicked dog to go after any dog he chooses. Kai has been attacked by Cowboy an several occasions, and Cowboy will even run across the park just to "get" Kaiser. Tim was with him when the worst attack happened and Cowboy cornered Kai behind a trash can. Everyone there described Kai's noises and "crys of terror and pain". Tim scooped my baby dog up and came home. I think Cowboy's owner was pretty lucky that I wasn't there that day. Mama bear may have come out.

So today there was another dog, same breed, same color named Cowboy at the park. Still a barker like lots of herding dogs, but not mean. It was strange. A New Cowboy. I didn't know what to think.... had Cowboy been reformed? I couldn't spot his owner, but as inattentive as he is, that didn't surprise me.

I found out from New Cowboy's dad they are new here and came in with an unfortunate name and look. . Bad Cowboy has been ejected from the park and banished never to return. It's a day of celebration in my book.

All I have to say is "look out" to any of you that frequent Cosmo. I hear that's where Bad Cowboy goes now, and he's a mean one.

Snip, Snip

This morning we took Kaiser to the Dr. He was pretty excited to be going in the car. He probably thought we were going to the park, although I never said "Park!" like I do when that is our intended destination.

Because he has some trouble going on with his bones (he has grown so fast and has some inflammation along the growth plates of his long bones on all 4 legs) he's been having to take it easy for the last week. He has another couple weeks of that coming. That means we haven't been getting outside to play hard, haven't been to the park, haven't even been on any long walks.Pretty sad for a dog who loves going to the park to air it out with his friends.

When we arrived at the Dr's office and made our way inside, Kai was thrilled to see all the other young dogs there. He was pretty sure this was going to be the best play date ever.

As we sat (impatiently) in the waiting room, he licked at his boy bits. "Lick 'em if you've got 'em, Kai." Poor guy doesn't have a clue what's coming.

This afternoon when we pick my baby (big) dog up, things will be different, but all he'll know is that he's sure happy to see his Mom and Dad. We'll be the ones who rescue him. We'll love on him this weekend and he'll be fine.

Doggie Un-Friendly

Before I ever had a dog, I remember Sunday mornings spent on bar patios (sorry, Mom) drinking bloody marys while sleepy dogs lounged in puddles of sunlight nearby. It was everywhere. Iguana Macks, Salty Senorita's, Dos Gringos, that great bar in Snottsdale with the couches and the kitchen that stays open til 3am....

Now when I want to spend a full day with my favorite dog there are no fun dog-friendly places to be found. What's the deal? What happened? Where did they go?

I search online, I google my little heart out and all I find are reviews pre-2008 talking about how *great* all these places are yet none of them are dog-friendly today.

Don't get me wrong, there are a couple places I know of. There's a coffee shop in Gilbert that has a walk-up window and caters to dogs. There's always Chipotle. And of course there's the dog park. But I want something more! I want to be able to spend a relaxed weekend morning having an egg burrito and a bloody mary with my friends, my husband, my DOG!

Help. What do you know that I don't and that google won't reveal?